April 7, 2017

It is another good day. The depression is very light. The beast is quiet. No panic attacks. No headache. And I slept well. I only woke twice and once was when the dogs were barking.

I have work tonight so I got up a little too early but I did not stay up as late as I wanted too last night. I was too tired to do so.

My wife is gone already. She is over my youngest's helping her get her house ready for a special visitor. She has a new boiyfriend now. She has split up with her husband and is filing for divorce. I don't feel bad for him. He brought this on himself. I feel bad for the kids. They need a father in their lives. All kids need a father. They are old enough to understand that something is wrong but not old enough to understand what or why. This is the third time they have split up and it seems to be the last. If he had just listened to her it could have been avoided but he only gave her lip service. Now it is too late. I dare say he is learning that she meant what she said. He pushed her away and so now she is gone. For good. A piss poor situation that is true.

I am a bit itchy today. Kind of nervous and jerky. Not at panic attack. Not quite. Just twitchy. Hands are twitching and so are my feet. Kind of hard to think. I'd take a clonozepam but they are reserved for when it gets really bad. Which it is not. Not by a long shot. I could use to get out of here for a while. Just a little ride or something. Something to get me out of these 4 walls. They press in on me.

I just spoke to my wife and she says she will be home soon. I hope so. I really do.

This twitchiness just came up out of the blue. I was doing well and then I started twitching. It is even hard to type with my hands going as they are.

Miah is being potty trained, again. This time he is doing well. I am proud of him. So far it has been a week without accidents. He is too small to get up on the toilet by himself but with a little help he makes it. We should get him a step stool so that he can do it all by himself. He already dresses himself. Well mostly enyway. He still has a hard time getting his shirts on right but he tries. He does not know forward from backward yet.

Well that it for today. At least so far.

Be good, stay strong and always remember the magic found in smiles and hugs and laughter. It can change your life for the better if you let it.

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Comments (2)

  1. Bettymom

    Did you get a chance to get outside for just a little while? I hope so – I’ll bet it would make you feel better.

    April 07, 2017
    1. noahbody

      Not today I didn’t.

      April 07, 2017