March 20, 2017

It is a good day relatively. Depression is light so far. The beast is quiet. No headaches. No panic attacks. I slept well allthing considered. I am waiting for coffee to get done.

Ahhh... there it is done. A good pot. Mmm Mmm.

Alone again. Naturally. Or I may as well be. Tiece and Bobbi are here but the tension could be cut with a knife. They must have been fighting, All is silent in the household. I miss my wife. I tried to call her but she is not answering. I wanted to warn her not to come home. She does not need this. She is already depressed enough.

Depression blows. It sucks all the light out of life. It turns everything dark and dreary. It makes mountains out of mole hills. It takes everything good and makes it bad.

She just called me back. I warned her to stay away. Dunno if she will heed that warning or not.

I am going down again. I wake up feeling OK then I go down day after day after day.

Work tonight. Not looking forward to that. I have tonight and tomorrow night then I am off for 2 days then I work a 3 nightwork weekend and after that I have vacation for a week. We will go down to North Carolina. I have work to do down there. I never get a true vacation. Not like my wife. I do not get to get away. I should do that. Take a vacation just for me. Go somewhere just for me. But it wouldn't be any good without her with me and she wants the work done in NC.

I am the beast and the beast is me. He just roused himself. He is back as always.

I cannot take this. Not again. Not now. Not ever.

Be good and all of that good stuff. Stay strong. Remember the magic.

To leave a comment, please sign in with
or or

Comments (2)

  1. Munkyman

    Not digging the Sithlord avatar. :P

    March 20, 2017
    1. noahbody

      It is me today. LOL!

      March 20, 2017